Beauty's in the eye of the beholder

05 March 2015 | Lloyd Hughes is a website that presents itself as ‘the largest internet dating community exclusively for the beautiful’, stating on its homepage that it’s been described as an “elite online club, where every member works the door.” It doesn’t stipulate who described it as that.

Basically it’s a bunch of narcissistic egotists who get their similarly conceited online chums to vote on how beautiful they are. Sounds marvellous.

The site was in the news today as it’s decided to jettison 3,000 members who’ve ‘let themselves go’ and who no longer match up to the site’s ‘rigorous standards’. Apparently the main reasons for culling have been down to members putting on a bit of timber, and ageing ‘gracelessly’. How dare they, the inconsiderate swine!

Tawnie B from Florida who underwent a makeover in order to gain acceptance on the site was put forward as the face of membership and said, ‘If the management failed to maintain the quality of the site by polluting the gene pool, most members would leave. It would make Beautiful People just like every other dating site – full of the kind of people you wouldn’t want to share an elevator with, let alone date.’

Nice one, Tawnie. Not that we’re being judgemental here, or taking things at face value and making assumptions based on the look of things alone, but your name suggests that you’re not the type of person I’d like to share an elevator with, regardless of your comment.

Based on her pictures Tawnie is admittedly attractive, but in a vacuous, airhead kind of way. I imagine if you got trapped in an elevator with her you’d tire of her pretty quickly, let alone when dating her.

It’s a decent, if basic, PR stunt by the site, which doesn’t try to hide its nature so has no qualms about the indignant bile thrown its way in the Daily Mail comments. The kind of people that are likely to apply to join probably aren’t Guardian readers either.

In fairness, it’s actually quite tempting to those who are easy on the eye. Am I good looking enough? Would I get the nod? Can I cope with the crippling shame of rejection if not? Or should I just ignore it and not worry about a few vain bimbos not thinking I’m good enough to join their club?

It’s an easy decision to make. However I might mull over it a bit as I head to the gym tonight and sculpt my guns ready for my photo-shoot at the weekend, just to make sure that I make the right one. Ciao, people. Ciao. *flicks hair over shoulder*